towbah « Peacespective

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Reflections on Haj

The conditions for an accepted towbah are, remorse, making amends and a sincere intention not to commit the sin again. Back-biting or similar offenses are best amended by making dua for the person, doing/giving sadaqa in their name or the like. Going up to a person and telling them you have been talking or talked behind their back will only make things worse. For those of you leaving to haj soon, I include part of a letter I wrote to someone concerning her trip to haj. May it be helpful and please do remember us in your dua. Two thoughts stay with me from my first haj. One was the shock with which I discovered that I remained very much a mortal there. I was under some impression that as soon as I saw the Kaba it would be pretty much a spiritual experience and nothing less. I found out to my chagrin and great annoyance that one still had to heed such human needs as sleep and looking for a bathroom. I remember once having walked for so many hours (I was afraid of the driving there and declined riding taxis!) that as soon as I prayed Asr in a mosque on our way home, I fell into a deep sleep in sujood. The women there thought I had passed out. So, that was a disappointment that your body still existed and had needs.

Dhul-Hijjah Preparation: amanas and towbah

Our second step in getting ready for Dhul Hijjah is returning all amanas to their owners. In fact it is a good idea to have a place close to the front door where you place all borrowed items that need to be returned, so they do not get mixed up with your things and you forget they were borrowed. Keeping items from their owners through negligence or forgetfulness is a serious matter. Take three days to go through your house for any book, clothing or appliance that is not yours. Rack your brain and go through your papers for any money you owe anyone, or that was given to you to give away as sadaqa that is still sitting around. Sadaqa money that has not been dispensed with on time will bring darkness and heaviness into the home.